Everyone Cam

Here are a couple of effective things you can say if the boss finds you asleep at your desk:

1. "Oh man, I must have left the top off the liquid paper again."

2. "When I donated blood at the Red Cross today, they told me this might happen."

3. "I'm testing the drool resistance capabilities of my computer keyboard.

4. "I'm just pacing myself for the all-nighter tonight."

And the best one is.....

"I'm in the management training program."

Please feel free to use these highly effective responses.

Oh God, I'm so jealous. Try this sometime:

Monday 8:30pm Try to go to bed.
Monday 9:30pm All attempts at sleep unsuccessful.
Monday 10:00pm Still trying to fall asleep. End up watching CSI.
Monday 11:30pm Finally fall asleep.
Tuesday 3:30am Really loud alarm goes off. Yes, that was only 4.5 hours of sleep.
Tuesday 4:30am Start work. Try to be friendly to jerk-off customers.
Tuesday 1:00pm Done with work. Sleep for one hour at mom's.
Tuesday 6:30pm Class.
Tuesday 9:00pm. Home. Could it be a longer day? Ever?

You need a reboot.

It's Ash Wednesday and I just got back from church. I now have a BIG BLACK thumb print on my forehead. It figures....I couldn't get the priest with the petite hands...No....I get ashes put on my forehead by Father "Big Thumb" Sullivan. If they keep this stuff up, I'm switching religions.

Haywood, try my approach. Go from being a Catholic to a part-time Catholic. Yup, our religion has that nice fail-safe that says if you sin and say you're sorry, you'll be forgiven. So, live it up and just say you're sorry every night. It should do the trick.

Those ashes are fun to wash off...I think it's just the priests' way of living a thug life and pretending it's graffiti, so they mark you like you're gang property. Come to think of it, it must be true...because calling someone "G" must stand for God...yeah, that must be it.

Thug life - Holy Trinity style!

Mike and I went to church this morning too. The priest was from some Eastern European country, where they apparently put the ashes in your hair right above your forehead. Unfortunately, the eucharistic minister that we had didn't follow suit and went with the big splotch on the forehead.

It's always nice when you get to have this conversation all day:

Some non-Catholic: So, did you go to church this morning?

Me: No, I just like to smear dirt on my face. It's a new trend I'm trying to start.

I look like someone nailed me in the forehead with a paintball gun. I think I'll put on my "autographed" rabbit hat to cover it up.

Looks sweet with a suit and tie!