Everyone Cam

"Some mornings, it's just not worth chewing throught the leather straps."

Emo Philips

"A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls."

and.....

"It's clearly a budget....it's got a lot of numbers in it."

and.....

"Rarely is the question asked: 'Is our children learning'."

All of these beauties were uttered that great statesman, George Dubya Bush.

I'm not sure if movie quotes are allowed here, but these are 2 of my favorites that I use regularly:

From Top Gun:
"I said to Hollywood, "Where'd he go?" Hollywood says, "Where'd who go?""

From Princess Bride:
"I am not a great fool, so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of you. But you must have known I was not a great fool, you would have counted on it, so I can clearly not choose the wine in front of me..."

"The Stones.....I love The Stones. I watch them whenever I can. Fred...Wilma...and that Barney Rubble...what an actor."

Steven Wright

"Can someone please explain to me why Kamikaze pilots always wore helmets?"

Dave Edison

"Let's face it...a date is a job interview that lasts all night. The only difference between a date and a job interview is, not many job interviews is there a chance you'll end up naked at the end of it."

Jerry Seinfeld

"When I die, I want them to bury me upside-down so that the whole world can kiss my ass."

-I have no idea who said that, but words to live by nonetheless.

Bobby Knight

Bobby Knight? Figures.

At one time, my cube wall was covered with thoughts to remember....

Knowledge is Power.
-- Francis Bacon
(it got me through college, but in the real world you learn that's not what gets you places!)

Faithless is he that says farewell when the road darkens.
-- JRR Tolkien

When the character of a man is not clear to you, look at his friends.
-- Old Japanese Proverb

In prosperity our friends know us; in adversity we know our friends.
-- ???

Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but some abuse the privilege.
-- Bumper Sticker :)

"If you choose not to decide -- you still have made a choice!"
-- Neil Peart (Rush)

"We must develop and maintain the capacity to forgive. He who is devoid of the power to forgive is devoid of the power to love. There is some good in the worst of us and some evil in the best of us."
-- Martin Luther King Jr.

"So much of what we call management consists in making it difficult for people to work."
-- Louis Armstrong

APATHY: If we don't take care of the customer,
maybe they'll stop bugging us!!

"A mediocre man is always at his best."

"I don't what it is about great sex that makes me wanna CRAP!"

One of the great quotes of all time. Thanks for the big smile eric.

If I remeber right, that was said to Woody Harrelson's character by a lady that played his landlord in a movie spoof about bowling called "Kingpin". Harrelson had just had sex with her because he couldn't pay the rent. He was bent over a toilet puking his guts out when she uttered that classic line.

So funny!

"As God as my witness, I thought turkeys could fly!!!"

Arthur Carlson, "WKRP in Cincinnati"

"Did the Americans give up when the germans bombed Pearl Harbor?..... No!!!!!!"

"Bluto" John Belushi

Every one in the bar: "NORM!!!!"

Sam Malone: "How's life treating you Norm?"

Norm Peterson: "Like a baby treats a diaper."

Cheers!

Here's a couple quotes you never want to hear from your doctor when you're having surgery.....

"Nurse, please pick that up off the floor, we may need it later."

or

"OOPS!"

"Follow your dream!! Unless it's the one where you're at work in your underwear and there's a fire drill...."

"Some doctors think that the chemicals we are being exposed to could, potentially, cause brain damage. However, I think that fish crunchy bits of salami my new red hippie noodles. Naked pool frogs?"

"Sometimes....I lie awake at night and ask 'God, Why Me?' Then, a voice answers, 'Nothing personal, your name just happened to come up.'"

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